quickieview -- Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen

Simpleng premise muna: Nagkayayaan sa office. Led by our ArtDirek, napagkasunduang sa Trinoma manonood kasama ang isang dosenang kaopisina. Wala namang problema, sanay na ako sa mahabang biyahe (sleeping pill ang bus aircon para sa 'kin) kaya sumama na rin ako. Wala talaga akong balak manood ng T:RotF kasi alam ko na popcorn flick lang yun, pero wala namang mawawala sa pakikipag-bonding sa sa mga kaopisina--teka, kinilabutan yata ako sa sobrang kakornihan nun a. Next paragraph, please!

Sabi nga ni Ma'am Libay, kapag manonood ka ng Bay film, dapat malayu-layo ka sa screen kasi sensory overload daw. Di ko alam kung anong na-experience ng dalawa naming kasama na nawala sa harapan, pero sa layo ko na sa row "L" e ramdam nga ng mata't tenga ko ang hagupit ng effects. Wala namang mali sa razzle-dazzle method ni Mr. Bay, yun lang e dapat consistent siya.

Ang problema ko lang sa T:RotF ay ang consistency nito. Nagsimula siya sa high note: robot battles at perfectly angled ass ni Megan Fox, pero hindi niya na-maintain yung tension ng first 10 minutes. Hindi ko naramdaman na mas malaki ang at stake (to quote Libay) sa character na ni Leboof (ganyan ko siya gustong ispilengin). What follows is an hour or so of wondering whether to advance the plot or just be crazy.

Always the go-to guy when it comes to 'crazy', hindi talaga ako na-disappoint ni Bay--which is a bad thing. As with Armageddon and the first Transformers, build up lang nang build up ng cringe-worthy comedy ang T:RotF. May mga laugh-out-loud moments naman, tulad nung adik na mom ni Witwicky, pero overall ang comedic chops nito ay kasing blunt ng Scary Movie at American Pie. In short, slapstick.

May niggabots. May annoying latino third wheel na walang ibang purpose kundi mag-bitch and whine. May fourth character na total ass in every sense of the word (na binigyan pa ng subplot!). Not to mention that SpongeBob-sounding (as our ArtDirek noticed) ex-Decepticon na literally naglaho na lang after his purpose in life (or as a plot device) was complete. Alam mo na agad na insecure ang director kapag nag-pile na lang sila ng fluff between crucial action scenes.

Pero yun ang dilemma, nakakaantok ang pelikula kapag nagseryoso. Balik ulit tayo sa unang problema ng Transformers 2, na hindi na na-build up nang tama ang tension. Flat, kahit maaksyon, ang majority ng scenes leading up to final battle in Egypt. True story: nang ipinakita yung map kung saan nakatago ang 'ancients' at mga kalahating dosenang dots all over the world ang nag-blink, ang naisip ko na lang ay, "WTF, ipapakita lahat yan sa screen? No way!" Cut the crap, fools.

Unfair sigurong i-compare sa Dark Knight ang pure pop film na 'to, pero one of the better examples ng successful tension build up ang TDK e. Kahit medyo nag-taper off ang second half ng TDK (dahil hindi lang naman si Joker ng kalaban dun), gripping pa rin siya. Hindi kasi niya binibigay lahat sa simula. Same with Megan Fox--kung ang unang shot na makikita mo sa kanya ay ang kanyang pornstar pose sa motorsiklo, wala na, di na siya interesting for the rest of the movie (unless, of course, mag-wardrobe malfunction stunt siya bigla). Bay knew he must give his all in the sequel, nagkaproblema lang siya kung saan at kelan niya ito ibibigay. Even the first film has pulled this off quite successfully (pero yun lang, first film kasi yun kaya kailangan ng intro).

Wala naman akong reklamo pag aksyon na ang pinag-uusapan. Hindi siya si Michael Bay film kung walang spectacle. Mas malaki ang budget = mas maaksyon. Kahit nakakahilo yung transformation sequences dahil sa acrobatic stunts ng camera at hitik na naman sa overused slow-mo effect ang bawat lundag at suntok at sipa ng mga bots, you know you're getting the most out of your P170. Minsan lang hindi ko na malaman kung sino sa Decepticons ang nagsasalita kasi maraming gray-colored, kailangan ko pang mag-squint to make out their differences.

Inaantok na ako, kaya parting words na: huwag mo na lang akong gayahin kung manonood ka ng Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen. I expected a bit more from the film, but that's not how summer blockbuster films work. They set their own rules, whether you like it or not, at ang kaya mo lang gawin ay magsabi ng 'wow' sa bawat expertly choreographed na eksena. That, or ignore the whole thing completely.


Hindi na pala siya Quickieview. :D

wat

Her breasts were laid out in the open, moist and tender. She covered her left nipple with a finger and sighed. "I wish this one's a little lighter."

"What're you talking about? It looks fine to me."

"No, no, it's fine," she said. "It's just that when I look in the mirror, this one looks a shade darker than my other nipple."

He removed her hand and kissed the nipple slowly. He felt her body shiver.

"It's fine. Nothing to worry about."

"But don't you want perfect nipples?"

"Fine is perfect enough."

She laughed, relieved that her one flaw doesn't seem to bother the stranger. She held him close and whispered, "What about my bellybutton?"

"You don't have one."

"Exactly. Don't you want a woman with a bellybutton, just like old times?"

"Nah. They're gone for a reason."

She wondered what it was like to have bellybuttons. Those people in old pictures, in dusty books and in movies all sported bellybuttons. She reached down her tummy, tracing a small circle as if trying to etch a bellybutton out of nowhere.

"Look, if you want another body, you can always ask the Agency for replacement."

She shook her head. "Just thinking."

The stranger gently pushed her back to the bed and began kissing her from the neck down. "Stop thinking then. We got the whole night to ourselves."

She closed her eyes and moaned.

aww moment muna.

Inspired by a great moment in Elite Beat Agents.
Happy Father's Day everyone.

the salmonella scraps - at the ready

New genre, new set of blindfolds.

one pea at a time

Peashooters in Plants Vs Zombies are like your trusty blanket--they may not look the part, but they're reliable as hell. So don't take those plants for granted; they could come in handy when the next zombie apocalypse arrives in 20XX.

(Oh, and don't mind the arm. I got lazy.)

oh, shiny, let's post a rotten post

Got this from a Dtoid thread. Been thinking about this for a while, so blahblahblah read on:

13 things about Nelson

1) Back in high school, I've been involved in a somewhat nasty crime that only one other classmate knows about. Good thing that bad deed went unnoticed; I could've been suspended or worse, expelled. That, or throngs of fuming parents will chop off my head. Anyway, I'm a good boy now. And I can count!

2) Speaking of high school, me and a friend (or an acquaintance, I can't remember) decided during a computer class to create a webpage from scratch using the then-exotic HTM-blah "language". And when our Computer teacher found out, he scolded us for being a bunch of know-it-alls. Way to go, sir!

3) Another tale from high school (last one, I promise): during my first 2 years in secondary school, I was--not to brag--a member of the "prestigious" Top 10, swinging from 4th to 6th. But when my mom still complained during the commencement exercises that I'm still not doing good enough, something snapped. The next school year, teachers were suddenly wondering whatever happened to the good Nelson of yore. I was barely hanging in the top 20 and I'm having the time of my life because of a little game called Red Alert 2.

4) During those hardcore blackouts in the 90s, my cousins and I would climb up the roof of our grandma's house and just stare at the stars dotting the sky.

5) I studied briefly at UST when I was in Kindergarten. Briefly because I was a biyahilo kid back then and, well, you know what happens to biyahilo kids.

6) Watching films on the big screen has always been an intimate affair for me. I don't usually talk or eat or look sideways. I once told my brother not to talk to me at all before we watch Spider-Man 3. Boy, was I rude or what.

7) I'm especially rude when I'm half-asleep/awake. So don't talk to me when I'm still booting up, because the id's still in charge.

8) I once designed a home console called Alter-Ego with the "revolutionary floppy disk drive". Hell yeah!

9) I also designed an action-adventure game with similar controls to that Harry Potter game which I later realized was inspired by The Legend of Zelda. I remember I wrote on my spare notebook the control map and what happens when the character jumps.

10) Because of my all-too-familiar obsession with GBA NOT SP, I applied for a job at Jollibee as a service crew. 4 months later, I still don't have a GBA, but I stuffed my self silly with those delicious Tuna Cheese Pandesal. Allowance + personal salary = good times.

11) I think I mastered the art of "leading questions"--that is, if you think your suggestion will get rejected as a suggestion, make them think that it's their idea by carefully asking a lot of things that you know will lead to that suggestion of yours. Not recommended for everyday use, though, 'cause it gets tiring after a while. Besides, other people may be doing the same thing to me. Double win.

12) Back in 2004, I sent an email to Anino Entertainment inquiring if they accept interns. I never got a reply. Damn snobs.

13) Last bit: After watching The Truman Show when I was a teenager, I had this period of paranoia when I actually suspected that maybe I was in a reality show, too. Talk about stupid.



And that concludes another utterly useless post.

the world has its ways

when in doubt, refer to Jack Johnson's sublime lyrics:

I've been losing lots of keys lately,
I don't know what that means
But maybe I've been better off with things that can't be locked at all

Yeah, something like that.

==

I just realized that my phone is more of a camera/media player than an actual phone--all it does is receive weekly updates from the boss. I don't text or call unless necessary; as always, YM/email is my preferred mode of communication.

patikim muna from laiya

reminiscent dapat ng isang music video ni damien rice pero bahala na.

pseudesign -- original shmoriginal

ang pseudesign ay ang occasional musings ng isang occasional game designer. walang tama sa sinasabi niya, meron lang truth. o ha, deep naman.


Ilang buwan ding naglalaro sa isip namin yung game concept, tapos every time may RFP (Request for Proposal) isinisingit namin yung mechanic, secretly wishing na kami nga yung unang nakaisip nun. Nang ma-greenlight na yung project nito lang May, medyo excited naman ako (pero sa totoo, mas exhausted, ewan ko ba). Parang nabunutan ako ng tinik; tapos na rin sa wakas, pwede na tayong matahimik. Kasama sa pagkasabik na yun ang idea na baka may mapu-prove na rin kami na hindi lang kami outsource company na dahan-dahang sinusuyo ng aming Australia (hehe). Ito na yung chance na mag-stretch nang konti, ito na siguro ang project na may presumably less client feedback than, say, Jumble or Moorhuhn. Parang okay naman ang lahat. Kahit mukhang burned out na ang ilan sa core team--sino bang hindi, parang wala pa yata silang break--mukhang maganda ang forecast ng project na 'to.

Pero siyempre palaging may twist.

Habang nagri-research kahapon, nag-send ang isang opismeyt ng link ng isang game na may kaparehong game mechanic. Check ko raw yung link and be amazed. Sure enough, na-amaze naman ako. Na naging disappointment. Na naging mild depression.

Tinanong ko kung anong keywords ang ginamit niya sa paghanap. Sabi niya blahblahblah at blahblahblah raw. A, mali, sabi ko. Ang ginamit ko kasi dati ay blahblahblah. Yun kasi ang habit ko kahit noong college--kapag may naiisip kang idea na sa tingin mo hindi pa nag-e-exist, google lang ang sagot. Or kung meron mang ganun, i-search mo kung yung twist na iniisip mo ay original pa. Kung hindi, bahala ka na sa buhay mo.

Tanda ko pa kung paano ko naisip (o nadiskubre, since nag-e-exist na siya mula pa nung 8-bit days) yung mechanic. Nakikitira pa kami sa CIIT noon, nasa front row ako. Wala pa akong sariling PC noon, kaya bitbit ko palagi yung laptop ko mula Biñan hanggang QC. Tapos ayun, habang nagpi-pitch para sa isa na namang wasted GCP, dumating na lang basta yung idea. Dine-demo ko pa sa kamay ko kung paano mangyayari yun. Mukhang logical naman. Pumasa naman sa Google test. Aprub naman ang higher-ups.

Pero walang nangyari. Nag-pitch pa kami ng isang concept na may parehong mechanic. Tapos isa pa. Nakailang pitch pa kami na yun ang Key Gameplay Feature. Wala ring nangyari. Hanggang nitong May, na may nagkainteres ngang publisher, na sakto namang may lumabas nang isang game na may ganung concept din.

Ang una ko agad hinanap sa site ng game na yun ay yung copyright date. Aha, 2009! Hindi naman pala kami nalalayo, pero sayang lang talaga. Nag-collapse na yung USP ng product namin, tapos yung iba hindi naman ganun katibay. "Oh well" na lang talaga ang pwedeng sabihin.

Plan B na lang ay gawing mas interesting ang paggamit namin ng mechanic. At siyempre laruin ang "original" game for research. Yun muna ang update.



Here's an unsolicited, yet-to-be-googled idea: first-person, full 3D Object Hunt game.


____________________________________________________
Buti na lang walang pasok ngayon, pwedeng gumala sa mall habang nag-aasikaso ng mga papeles.